Anticipating

i hate not knowing.

It is very late at night, or very early in the morning, whichever way you want to look at it. I had some people over for a few drinks. Well not really a few. As a result i smell like a bar, my living room is a mess ,my bathroom smells like vomit and there are numerous trash bags outside with empty beer cans and fag ends. Yuck.

I return to England next week. I’m looking forward to it. I dont like the fact that i’ve gotten into a routine here, it brings on that whole “‘am i leading a double life?” kind of vibe to it. Man…Engalnd will mean the return of budgeting at Sainsbury’s, eating crap, watching football, and doing my own laundry again. Independent goodness. It sounds really stupid, but i opened up my suitcase to look for a shirt thats gone missing and it smelled like my room in london. It made me sort of homesick. Which made me realise that “man, is that what i think of as home now?” and truthfully, yes. That wacky dump is what i call home. Its mine, all mine.

Oh yeah. And at least i’ll be in the same country as Rob.