Back in Brunei

I’ve been back in Brunei for a weekend now. And it’s been brilliant. Friday night with best friends, girlfriends and milo at Jubilee and it was just like old times. Sitting around and doing fuck all. It was so good. Kate sat, looking beautiful and bitching about people (you know who you are). Tom paid out EVERYONE. He was on top form. I’m looking forward to hanging out with him and Jess.  Jess is infectious with her cheerful exuberance about how shit she feels.  Alison was effortlessly sexy with her stories about Kate, herself and some chocolate cake.  And Ronan had the best line of the night when he pulled a one-liner about me and Kate and safe sex.

Saturday was nice. The guys watched three hours of wrestling.  The girls watched three hours of Friends.  Then me and Matt met up with Alison and Kate and spent an informative night together talking loudly in restaurants and cafes. Alison wants to have sex with me (in Italian). Matt noticed my bulging thighs and balls.  There was some suggestion of a gay thing where Kate would make out with Alison on the condition that I make out with Matt (no).  It was kinda of quiet end to the night though.  Ended up just me and Kate.  A little shoplifting and some milo.  Sweet.

Don’t think we didn’t plan some killer parties. Kate and Matt came up with a ‘red’ party. So we’ll drink red wine, wear red pants (everyone in Brunei has red pants) and we can get red body paint and run around naked and completely red. Oh and we might be doing a Big Brother party with cameras and stuff too.

We’re having a small party next weekend but you’re not invited.

And Dan, don’t be so pooish about parties (re:  his last update somewhere below this one). Naturally, they will fully suck if you just sit and smoke and do fuck all.  And why are you such a Grinch and saying I’m simplistic because I’m enjoying myself? Be happy you stupid miserable cocksucker. And don’t call me a freak because I actually talk to my family.  We should hang out. Call me.

Sophie, you worrisome darling you. Don’t be overly-sensitive. The kids didn’t say anything nasty about you on Saturday and if they ever call you a heathen or something, take it in jest. Don’t forget to smile.

Our table for graduation is looking pretty sweet. Me and Kate, Matt and Alison, Tom and Jess all at the one table. We’ve also got Sonic John Foulkes! And Kristy…who I haven’t met but I’ve been told from different sources is chubby, skinny, loud, quiet and quite interesting. And Tim.  Ideally, we would’ve liked Sam and Oli at our table but you can’t have everything.

If you’re a guy and you’ve ever lived in Brunei you probably have a dirty habit that involves spending about three hours a day at your computer. You know what I’m talking about.  Championship Manager. Spending hours tooling around with your formation, trying to sign Owen (never happens but you try anyway), having an FA Cup run only to lose in the final to some crappy side you beat 3-1 in the league. Well, CM3.com has announced Season 01/02 is coming out in October. Beautiful.