The FAT Website est. 1999
I have done sufficient whack shit recently to warrant an update. Firstly, let me clarify that this is actually my last day in England, I fly out to the good auld U S of A tomorrow. Scary.
On thursday me and Swig (my cousin) threw the biggest house party ever. It was massive. I got so completely drunk and stoned that the only real memory of it I have is that I made an arse of myself, was drinking beer out of a measuring jug and singing along to every song that played. I seem to remember walking around butt naked for a while, but this has neither been confirmed or denied, probably for my own good.
It was actually crazy enough that I did so many substances, I punked up and passed out in a bed, and then about an hour into my sleep some chick came into my room, and violently shook me awake and ordered me out of bed, when I asked what for she answered “We’re gonna go smoke some more pot, C’MON!”. I looked at her like she was a lunatic, and then decided it was probably a good idea anyway, so smoked up again.
Swig slept with 3 girls that night. What a dick!
The next morning, we woke up, looked at the carnage that was the living room, decided cleaning up is a stupid idea, and so smoked some more pot.
Friday night, went out with all my mates into town and got hammered. Invited everyone back to ours and drank more before finally getting to bed at 7:30am. Woken up again at 8:00 as the girls had to go to work. 8:04, go back to sleep.
And apart from a nice little barbeque last night, yesterday was recovery time and cleaning the house time. Which brings me to now, and I swear to god that if I take in any alcohol in the next week, I will probably die.
All in all a very impressive 3 days.
